Holiday= Autoimmune Flares!

The hustle and bustle of the holidays can be the perfect conditions for an autoimmune flare. Shopping, cooking, cleaning, large gatherings and party after party. I will admit, I have not figured out how to “do the holidays” while trying to keep my autoimmune disease at bay.

I am the oldest of 5 siblings. For the last 25 years I have hosted a large gathering for Christmas Eve. My Great Grandmother always made Oyster stew and till this day I continue to follow in her footsteps. This year the baton was passed to my baby sister. It was one of the most difficult decisions, but probably one of the best decisions I have ever made.

I have 3 children and 3 grandchildren. I have been blessed to have everyone come home for the 2-3 days over Christmas. What more can a grandmother ask for? Leaving milk and cookies out for Santa at Grandma & Grandpa’s house! I get to relive the childhood excitement all over again! I could have never imagined how much love and joy I would receive from my grandchildren.   

Me being the oldest sibling, I have that 1st born birth order personality. I always organize way too much, lead too much and try to take care of everything and everyone. No one forces me to do this, in fact I probably drive my family crazy. If I feel I am needed, I am there. Some days I rarely sit down. I forget to feed myself because I am busy feeding everyone else. I make sure everyone else can shower and get ready and therefore I rarely “look my best” during the holidays.

This year I realized I was doing too much. I realized no one was forcing me to do any of this. Oh, I did put up fewer decorations, I cooked less, and I cleaned less, but I need to rest more, eat better and if need be skip a party or two. This year I also had 3, 2-3-hour dental appointments removing infection and Amalgam in a 2-week period. That alone is a lot of stress on the body. 

Many years ago, I started to notice how the women close to me always seemed to be stressed out during the holidays.  Do we put so much pressure on ourselves to give everyone the “perfect” Christmas that we forget about what truly is important? I think the saddest thing I realized is families are so busy we forget what the true meaning of CHRISTmas is.

For over 20 years I sang in a mass choir and performed 3 Christmas concerts. We would start practicing in early September. It was a huge commitment, but I loved it. It has been two years now since I retired from the choir. It was another difficult decision but a very good decision. I am slowing realizing I can no longer do it all. God is showing me what my priorities should be. He is showing me that concentrating on me and my health is not selfish.  Loving others and loving ourselves doesn’t mean we have to be everything to everyone.

In time I will learn to get through the holidays and stressful times without a flare. Each year that goes by I learn from my mistakes and my failures. I am not perfect, but I am grateful for my progress!